Old dog seeks new trick

[Old Dog]

So, I woke this morning and the whole thing hasn't disappeared into the night. It isn't a bad dream.

Just reading another thread and I think I'm maybe acting 'as if'. As if nothing has really happened, just I'm far more positive than before B day and trying to be pro-active.

Having said that she asked about the Tour de France last night: I'm a big fan and it starts in Yorkshire today. We have two friends who live nearby, they're her friends from way back. A couple of months ago I suggested we ask to go and visit this weekend, in fact I brought it up a couple of times. Then the bomb dropped. I haven't mentioned it since as it wasn't really a priority now.

So last night she asked me why I haven't done anything about it. S12 came in them so luckily I was prevented from saying what I really thought. I asked you, you didn't seem interested at all, you then drop the bomb and now your saying I should have seen to it and we needn't have stayed with friends.

W announced she's off to the nearest big town. When she comes back with something, normally I wouldn't make a big deal about what it us. Maybe even say 'what more boots?' in a jocular, but really, you do have boots fashion. I won't do that, but now I'm wondering how much 'oh that's really nice' should I lay on?

I should stress that this sort of reinforcing behaviour is something I need to work on but she won't necessarily appreciate right now as it's one of my failings and could be seen as chasing. Tightropes! I tell you I'm not a fan.

On a positive note, my therapist texted a reminder about my session on Monday. I gave so much to say and work on.