I went to visit my IC yesterday. I haven't seen her in probably nine months or so. I thought with D20's sitch and a number of other stressful things on my plate it might be good to check in. After the drive from hell getting to her place, I updated her on things. It was good to hear that Voldy and I are on the right track (in her view) in dealing with D20. She did say that it might be best not to hit her too early in this with the move your butt or move your stuff approach. We talked about my job stress. My job this past year especially is like being dropped into the middle of a combat zone each day. We also talked about my switching faith groups. I told her my strategy in dealing with all this stress was to concentrate on one thing at a time rather than trying to unwind the whole ball at once, it's too complicated and overwhelming. I'm doing Qi Gong each morning and some prayer/meditation in the evening. I figure that this is one area that will have a positive effect on all the stressful parts of my life these days. In the evening D20 phoned and apparently her and Voldy had a all out battle. Voldy had a bad day at work...as usual, and came home "taking it out on us". When D20 was talking to me Voldy started yelling and they were arguing and D17 was getting into it too. Apparently, Voldy had thrown a plate earlier and i heard D20 say "Hey, if you wanna throw things I can call the cops, you know. If that's what you want I'll do it" Finally, D20 said she was going to hang up cuz Voldy was getting angry that she was talking to me. My advice to D20 was that she needed to de-escalate the sitch which means to stop arguing back with her Mom right now. Later, when everyone is cool then approach how to fix the situations that seem to trigger these outbursts. I didn`t run over to fix things, this is their issue to work out. So we had planned to meet tonight to discuss D20's job hunting strategies and lay down some expectations on her. We'll see...looking forward to it...not!
