WAW...Again, Part III

[stumps]

Well, no response from W...but that's ok. No expectations. It was a nice gesture on my part no matter what.

It is funny though, looking over our text history from the past couple of weeks, there is an unmistakable contrast between then and now. In the past couple of weeks her texts are full of "Can't wait to hang out with you" "Miss your company" and kissy-lips emojis. Now... nothing.

But to quote a saying I'm not to fond of, but find myself repeating a lot these days... It is what it is.

What does have me feeling a little wonky though is what I found today as I was submitting our counseling statements to the insurance company. W apparently forgot (or maybe she wanted me to find it) that on the back of one of hers, her therapist had written for her what was essentially a script on how to break it to the kids that we were getting divorced. It was dated about a month and a half ago, which would have been after W said she wanted to stay in the house and work on her stuff and get used to the new me, and pretty much at the height of things going well between us.

I'm not even sure it's the script itself that bothers me... I think it's more the fact that it was written by her therapist. In the 8 years W has been seeing this therapist, the therapist has done almost nothing to offer practical advice or resources for W to work on her issues (W has identified codependency as chief among them). Her therapist hasn't even recommended a book to read or anything, and W has commented on and complained about it several times, lamenting that her therapist is a good listener but doesn't do much to help her address and "fix" her problems the way my therapist does, and my IC has even done more as far as offering reading suggestions and support groups etc for W. So... it bothers me. Bothers me that her therapist is apparently a sympathetic ear but has barely lifted a finger in other regards, yet here she is writing out for W what she should say to the kids.

The other thing that kind of knocked me off center today was a conversation I had with our neighbor. She currently has a friend of her husband living in their basement apartment. The friend is going through a divorce himself, and when I asked her how long he was planning on living with them she said "Hopefully not too long, for his sake. Not if he's planning on moving on and dating again because I don't know any woman that would want to date a 40-something year old man who was living in the basement of his friend's house." Kind of hit me in the gut, because that's basically the prospect I'm looking at if I want to continue living near the kids...particularly if I want to stay in their school district. This city is so god-d@mn expensive I could never afford to live here or even near-by on my own. Realistically, if I want to stay close to the kids, I'm looking at renting a room in someone's house. Otherwise, to afford my own place I'm looking at moving pretty darn far away.