I actually have a certain amount of compassion for OW. They rarely seem happy. They clearly have big issues. They've sold themselves low and there's no doubt that they are at least a little bit aware of it.
I dunno. I have very little compassion for the OW in my case. I know she had an affair with a previous boss, and it ended in divorce for him. (She wasn't yet married.) She told my husband that she wasn't that type of girl. Except she is. A very, very broken girl.
I also remember when I met her (!) about two months before the BD. She asked me how my H had proposed to me. The absolutely flat expression on her face as I told the story is what resonates with me. It was really, really weird. It didn't set off alarm bells at the time, but looking back on it now it positively gives me the willies.
Quote:
There are thousands of ways for people to be vulnerable to bad choices. I'm sorry my husband now falls in that category, but if I can show compassion to a young, troubled OW should I deny it to my husband of sixteen years?
Which is the reason I defaulted to standing for my marriage in the first place, and the reason I'm struggling to be clear on why and how I will continue to stand for it.
This I totally get. I think my husband made a really bad choice. I think he truly hopes (hoped?) that it would not hurt anyone. I think he is starting to recognize that many people are being damaged by this.
I hope (HOPE) that his trip with our 15 year old daughter made him evaluate what knowledge of this whole mess would do to her.
