My D17 is developmentally disabled and is absolutely blessed with an inability to hold grudges and hurt. She loves unconditionally and continues to be a role model for my family. Every day is groundhog day with her.
My D20 now hardly remembers life where we all lived together. She's well adjusted and I haven't hesitated to put her into IC when I felt she needed to process. (You can't do that with a 20 year old LOL. I just guide her to make good decisions for herself now.) She admits that she would have preferred us to remain a family under one roof. But she doesn't hesitate to let everyone know that she has been blessed to have the situation that worked for her. After our first disastrous year of separation--where we took turns on holidays with the kids, who were 9 and 6 then--we all decided it svcked and committed to sharing holidays to include both of us. It's been modified some years (when I take the girls to my parents in VA or he takes them to his dad's in MT), but for the most part, we spend holidays together as a family.
I won't go into the saga of what really brought us back to sharing time with each other (club volleyball), so just suffice it to say that we're in a really good place now. I did it for the girls, but also for me. I had to know what it was like to forgive someone and allow God's grace and forgiveness in the process. Because I wasn't 100% in the right either.
No plans here. My D20 works at Maggiano's and is probably going to have to work. My D17 and I will figure something out by then. We always do.
Take care and be nice to yourself this long weekend!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
She's well adjusted and I haven't hesitated to put her into IC when I felt she needed to process. (You can't do that with a 20 year old LOL. I just guide her to make good decisions for herself now.) She admits that she would have preferred us to remain a family under one roof. But she doesn't hesitate to let everyone know that she has been blessed to have the situation that worked for her. After our first disastrous year of separation--where we took turns on holidays with the kids, who were 9 and 6 then--we all decided it svcked and committed to sharing holidays to include both of us. It's been modified some years (when I take the girls to my parents in VA or he takes them to his dad's in MT), but for the most part, we spend holidays together as a family. 
