WAW separation begins

[rayzzz]

Don't know if this has been touched on yet but Emotional Affairs temptations of LBS seem to be something I have just realized and am trying to avoid.
I think many of us miss our WAW as our best friends. It just ain't the same sharing stuff with dudes! Or maybe thats just how I connect. I have just met this new divorced woman and we are becoming friends but I realize "wholly cow man, you just want her as a best friend to fill the void of your W!"
That kind of neediness has to go and as a spiritual person I am going to throw that need for deep friendship to God.
Sex is not the temptation its that safe emotional bond.

Ugh.

Think I am really vulnerable today as well cause i had a career highlight as a musician playing for Canada Day and I wish my WAW and kids could be there to share my accomplishments....it just hurts. Plus for the first time ever I did not talk or see my children today. ugh. First month...it will get easier...
And I am taking them overnight tomorrow for the first time so that will be exciting.

On top of this my mentor,family therapist friend(F) who I always confide in...who we both always confided in before BD, my WAW says she talked to him! He has been a main support in this painful time and she texts me:

"I talked to F today..he is proud of us in our own way...this won't be easy but we will find our way and we will make it"
WTF does that mean? F always shared realities that some M fail and others beat the odds after separations, affairs etc...
Is he telling WAW "well if you feel its over" and at the same time telling me "well keep fighting for it"?
**But even though I felt this way I forced myself to validate and texted back
"I am glad you talked to him. He's always been such a support to both of us.**" sound good vets?

I am just reacting I think and mind reading....deep breaths...doesnt matter what he says I am still not giving up...

So this day has been rough but I am going to end it on a good note with some mind heart clearing meditation. PMA PMA PMA PMA
ok...and go..(limping forward)