Hang in there T0. Ben is right. Your H cannot last with this young girl.... and to be perfectly honest when the novelty wears off for her she'll want a guy closer to her own age.
M 35 W 31 D 10 Married 3 years Together 11 Single since Nov 13 Moved out Dec 13 ILYBNILWY, 'I don't want to be a boring housewife, 'I don't fancy you any more' OM confirmed Jun 14
I so related to most of what you type. Mine however is dating a woman exactly his age, something he said he would never do. My sitch is looking very black, he doesn't contact is done beyond burnt.
There are small glimmers of positive i see, he does contact, he will get tired of girl and her immaturity and you also have kiddies.
Hands to cyber tissues and a chocolate frog. If nothing else I'm holding up your hand in cyber space.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Your situation is VERY NEW. Right now there is no way your Dad---as wise as he may be--or anyone else, for that matter, can possibly know what the future holds as far as your H's actions.
The only way you can be 100% sure he's not coming home, is if YOU make up your mind that you will not let him come back.
And that's the decision you have to make, whether or not you'd be willing to take him back after he stops carrying on...
A lot of people assume that in cases such as this, you should just cut your losses and dump him, divorce him, the sooner the better. They're not comfortable with the uncertainty and it sure isn't easy.
But it's your M, you have kids together... so there's a lot to lose.
Don't be in such a hurry to write him off for good at this point, unless that's what you want.
I'm pulling for you!
--GG
Me 54 Him 63 M 23 T 29 0 Kids Funny Farm of Rescues 12/12 OW-- 5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied 9/13 Proof OW: ENDED 2/14 Got D papers on my BD I kicked him out for my sanity 9/14 He wants to "talk"?
exactly GG....T0324, remember no matter what anyone says to you, its your family that counts, Keep up the fight and unless you are ready to stop fighting keep going...that's one thing YOU have control over...when you want to stop.
Me: 42 W: 39 D: 2 age 6 and 9 D-Day: Dec 29 13 Seperated: 3/20/14 Mediation retainer : 5/20/14 She filed: 06/25/14
Thank you all for the kind words and most of all for supporting me. I know I say when and until tonight I really thought I was in a better place. As stupid and irrational as it sounds him and my dad going out and doing something tonight just struck a nerve. He and my dad used to take the boys to do things all the time on the evenings I was still at work. It was hurtful he can walk all over us as he has and still 'have his cake' and do something with my dad and the boys.
I know I need to let go and really drop the rope as I thought I was. The more time has passed lately the more I know he is never coming back. It had been almost 3 months with no talk about us or anything that is happening. He'll he didn't even tell me he filed for divorce. That speaks to clearly the issues we had obviously that I wasn't aware of.
I feel so cheated and so defeated. I do not want to picture my life without H. I do not want to see my boys with him and Ow away doing things that we all used to do together with our children. It just hurts. I hope I will wake up in a better place tomorrow.
I know how you feel...I haven't talked about our R with my wife in about maybe a couple of months...but I am noticing changes..and she filed also behind my back but I had a lawyer and he kind of took care of it...just be indifferent with him..thats the advice I got from a vet....
Me: 42 W: 39 D: 2 age 6 and 9 D-Day: Dec 29 13 Seperated: 3/20/14 Mediation retainer : 5/20/14 She filed: 06/25/14
No R discussion with my H either, unless you count angry spew. He also filed behind my back-- twice!
He's been out since he served me on my birthday in Feb.
But---it ain't over til it's over!
When I observe him (like a rat in a maze) I see a man who says a lot of things that his actions do not support.
I am not convinced he is anywhere close to divorcing me, no matter what he says.
The same may well be true for you.
---GG
Me 54 Him 63 M 23 T 29 0 Kids Funny Farm of Rescues 12/12 OW-- 5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied 9/13 Proof OW: ENDED 2/14 Got D papers on my BD I kicked him out for my sanity 9/14 He wants to "talk"?
