I had a really good day today, felt detached and positive.
I went to the gym after work and then came home and lost it. A huge wave of sadness came over me and I bawled for almost an hour. I can't believe this is happening. Maybe Ive been in denial all this time.
I NEVER would have thought this woman would leave me. She was always head over heels in love with me and willing to do anything for me.
I think back on all the things I did poorly. And I wish I could go back and have a do-over.
I miss her so much it hurts physically. I'm starting to think I loved her much more than she loved me.
I'm so sorry for the pity party. I'm just really struggling right now. I see a lot of people here having some contact with their WAS and I wonder what I'm doing wrong.
WAW has texted me 3 times in 7 weeks. I've followed the rules and never pursued her, I haven't reached out to her, I've given her her space. I just feel she is moving on and realizing that she doesn't have a need for me in her life. And I miss her daughter so much. I'm the only father she's ever known.
I just hurt.
It does hurt and sometimes you just have to feel it to move to the next level.
Don't worry so much about where she is, focus on where you are.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
