I don't believe EITHER of our faults in the M were worth him cheating with someone else whether it was EA or PA. I'm pretty sure it was EA until he left. I am totally wanting to listen to him and hear his grievances. However it is hard for me to want to do that while he has someone else in the picture that is so involved/controlling.
I did not equate one to the other. I knew she was in (at least) a EA, but that did not have anything to do with my speech, nor my reasons for giving her that speech.
Originally Posted By: T0324
I guess I just believe people deserve a chance to make things right and people deserve to know something is wrong instead of discussing it with other people. He felt there was no point in talking tome about it. I know that is my fault for I guess making him feel that way but if I made you feel that way and you don't tell me I never know.
Be careful how deep you look into this shallow well.
First, I did not do it to actually get answers. I really did it (at least in part) to acknowledge she should have time and space (removing pressures).
Second, even if she did feel up to giving the answers.... I do feel she would have had a tough time coming up with any, as she has not really had a clear head.
Originally Posted By: T0324
I guess I just believe people deserve a chance to make things right and people deserve to know something is wrong instead of discussing it with other people.
You may believe that, but for right now... he doesn't.
Down the road.... he may be praying for a second chance, and that will be up to you to give him one.
Me: 43 M: 10y S:15 ILYBINILWY 2/18/13 W moved out 2/18/13 Filed for D: 2/17/13 Got DB: 2/20/13 Got DR: 2/23/13 180 & LRT Began: 2/25/13 D Final Dec '13
Oh and do I ever ask H again to come get his stuff. I finally packed it up last week. Still didn't take. Down any pictures
Nah, leave it to him to bring it up. When he does... tell him "oh yea, It's all ready to go... when would you like to get it?"
Me: 43 M: 10y S:15 ILYBINILWY 2/18/13 W moved out 2/18/13 Filed for D: 2/17/13 Got DB: 2/20/13 Got DR: 2/23/13 180 & LRT Began: 2/25/13 D Final Dec '13
So you really have me thinking. NOT THAT IM GOING TO DO IT.
But things are getting better at each practice. I actually got a hello from him first. We played basketball with our son the entire practice. I'm sitting on the stands now watching him play with the boys.
I know keep it light and as if. I'll just walk to the car together and just say bye right? No small talk
So not sure what H problem is but he's trying to pick a fight whth me via text AGAIN
I just got a random text from him 'so what's the plans this weekend am I takin the boys with me or what?
I replied, ' yes, like we said last night if you're able to stay in town and watch them Saturday we'd appreciate it '
He said ' I already told you I'm not staying in town I have plans'
I haven't replied because I made it quite clear last night when we talked, why pick a fight now? Also I found out for a fact that the boss and boss wife are not going away like H said this weekend. So it is just him and OW. He thinks I'm letting the boys go? The same girl you told them was just your friend.
Any advice? Do I just not reply? Why is he picking a fight after we had a calm / easy time at practice
Oh I've gotten these texts before. Do not engage in nonsense. I thought you were getting someone else to watch them while you work? Did I miss something ? Otherwise, if you are afraid he's going to say you are keeping boys from him I would do this.
Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were going out of town and made other arrangements. However, if you want to take them, that would be great. Just let me know what you decide.
My guess is he won't take them. I don't think he and love bucket want to deal with kids. My 2 cents:)
Last edited by Georgiabelle; 07/01/1412:54 AM.
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
We agreed last night if he ended up staying in town he would take the boys. I have already made other arrangements. I really don't want to call his bluff on taking them this weekend because he is going ALONE with OW out of state 10 hours away. God forbid he said yes and went through with it my oldest S is not mentally ready for something like that. I would never forgive myself
But we made it perfectly clear and he agreed he would let me know if he was staying in town to watch them.
Oh gotcha. Then just a simple. "I've got it covered. Have a nice trip." Is sufficient.
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
My friends are saying I should let him take them with her. Let her get a taste of her new life. I really really don't want to do that.
I did send H this text
We discussed it last night and I thought we had a plan in place, sorry if we misunderstood eachother
He said 'no plan in place'
So i sent the screen shot of our conversation where he agreed to let me know if he stayed in town to watch them
I'm thinking of sending this
to be honest I really don't believe it's in the boys best interest to be put in that situation overnight and a weekend with someone they don't even know. They already are going through enough. They would be much happier spending time just the 3 of you