She can only manipulate her if you bite the hook.

If you get manipulated, it's on you.

Of course the kids love her. Your post is very difficult to understand, I'm not sure who's on solid ground.

Don't have R talks with her. Don't interfere with her process, you have enough to work on.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss