She says she's conflicted

[Oxford1]

Ok, how am I going to work on my Marriage if shes still communicating with OM.

YOU cant work on it while she is communicating with the OM.

I asked her calmly to not have hime come here again..She waxes and wains on this...Then goes Ape Sh33t on me about our past ills in our marriage.

She says I am going to leave both of you, starts crying etc...

Then like turning on a light switch she stops quiets down, says she is going to tell him to leave her alone even if he goes crazy on her..
(If it was not for legal advice I would have tried to record her when she calls him..just to see if shes honest)

Interestingly she leaves for work says she loves me its like the entire morning never happened??

I think this is why I get caught up in her and OM. Its her confusion.

I am thinking I should add this to my 180's and just walk away when she gets like this...I just do not want to be Passive-Aggressive.

See she was testing you to try to draw you back in.

Yes walk away when she get like that and STFU!

I know and I need to kick my self.
She tells me how he never shuts up, attacks me yada yada yada...

She tells me I repeat what I have told her..And she does this bbababab and makes talking gestures with her hands and says she has done this and dealt with it forever, but then admits only since her affair started.

I know she is being fed all this cr@p by OM and it drives me nuts. I get frustrated writing about it.

What he is trying to do is get her to get me angry enough to physically assault her.