thanks odsnt, I did actually look up Oli doyle, nice to hear a fellow aussie accent!
today has been a calm day for me, I don't know exactly why, but I was talking to my one good friend who is supporting me through this, she is brilliant, there truly is no judgement from her about my decision to save my m, she was actually teaching me 180's before I even knew what they were. I haven't seen my h since last night when I went to pick up the boys to bring them home from his place. I really expected to not hear from him for the next couple of days, then this morning he rang up to tell me that he'd organised to take next Wednesday off to spend it with us(id palnned on taking them to an indoor playground for the day) this is afirst on a few levels, 1) he never takes days off to spend with the kids on their bdays 2) he knows I was taking the day off to be with them 3) to ring me up and tell me when he could of sent a text.... then he asked how my day was going, I said busy, lighthearted voice, and said i'd better go. thwn this afternoon he rings again to tell me that our eldest son would be finishing school early due to school hols starting, ireplied that I knew and I planned to be there, again ,this would have been something that he could have texted.
so am I missing something here, but two nights ago, he tells me that he is truly done, that I have to let him go, other thsn cry(and he did too) I told him Id respect his decision, that we have to co parent together etc, and now he is ringing about mundane things, and showing involvement??? maybe the reason for the calm is knowing that our m as it was is truly over(I have actually taken off my wedding rings for the first time yesterday-feels very weird)and now we can begin to "friend" each other, a real true beginning?? I have been asked a couple of times today if I think he is seeing ow, and honestly, I don't know and for the first time, I can say, I have no control over what he does, I do know that its his life, and his choices, and he needs to work his sh*t just like I do. on a brighter note, I have signed myself up for pole dancing classes, a bit of core strength never hurt anyone lol, and beginner yoga, my mind races constantly so it'll be good for me.
