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Joined: Apr 2014
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(Sorry---all caps---sounds like yelling.)

In a firm voice: " No Divorce Card".

As others said, what's your motive?

There is nothing to be gained except irritating him, and surely it will. Or at least confuse him about what you mean or want.

Why not give yourself a divorce card--and a big slice of pie a la mode to go with it.

You deserve it.

smile


Me 54 Him 63
M 23 T 29
0 Kids
Funny Farm of Rescues
12/12 OW--
5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied
9/13 Proof OW: ENDED
2/14 Got D papers on my BD
I kicked him out for my sanity
9/14 He wants to "talk"?



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Although my tall dark and handsome boyfriend keeps saying he wants to send my ex a thank you card, since we would never have met if my ex hadn't run off! lol wink

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Lol kml that's very funny! With my impending divorce about two months ago I felt inclined to do the same. Its mainly due to the fact I still felt like I wanted one last chance where he read the card and was like you know what wife you're right divorce isn't the answer lets try to work this out because somewhere deep in my black heart I still love you. But now I'm at the point where I'm actually starting to feel sorry for him and I feel I should live my life and be with someone who appreciates and treasures my love. Well I've had over a year to process these emotions you only have had two months since the divorce was filed?! That's insane. If it helps just write a letter to him and then throw it away. It sounds stupid but it works for me.


Me: 27 H: 26
T:4 M: 2
B: 6/2013
Divorce Filed: 2/4/2014 (Our anniversary)
D: 8-4-14
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Be very aware of why you're sending it if you choose to do so.

I think closure (and I'm not sure we ever get closure on anything) happens as a process, not a single act.

It's grief and acceptance.


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
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cczamo Offline OP
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Thanks GG!
I am happy that you are living proof of something better than you ever expected!


M 56 H 52
M 13.5 T 15
S 28 twinStep Ds 24
ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14
Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14
Divorce final 7/8/14


Joined: Oct 2005
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Don't do it. It's chasing and it will be received as such. Deal with your pain with those who love you. Sorry, I know it's hard, hard, hard!


Divorced February 27, 2012.

"Only by love is love awakened".~ Ellen G White
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cczamo Offline OP
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Thank you for your input, whatitis. It is so hard to not even say goodbye. But I know sending card would only make me feel good, not him, so I will resist sending.


M 56 H 52
M 13.5 T 15
S 28 twinStep Ds 24
ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14
Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14
Divorce final 7/8/14


Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 110
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cczamo Offline OP
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Lostinpain, I don't know how I'm just now seeing your post from days ago. I may feel like you did 2 months ago, and hope for a miracle that his black heart might reconsider, but I'm not sure what my motive really is....is that strange? Intellectually, I know it probably would irritate the heck out of him. Maybe I need to search myself better to know what my real motive is to want to send a D card. Morbidness? Rub it in I can be better than you are-ness? Drama? It bothers me that I dont know my motive. Yikes.


M 56 H 52
M 13.5 T 15
S 28 twinStep Ds 24
ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14
Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14
Divorce final 7/8/14


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cczamo Offline OP
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Well, honestly I WOULD want him to reconsider D before Ddate and WOULD take him back (with conditions that he have IC and we have MC and go through alot of work).


M 56 H 52
M 13.5 T 15
S 28 twinStep Ds 24
ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14
Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14
Divorce final 7/8/14


Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
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You can't make him think about anything and the more you attempt to push him to think, the more adamantly he will go in the opposite direction.


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
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