I don't understand why he would want to be married to me when I have cleary stated that the only reason I have hesitated is because I'm concerned how divorce would affect our kids.
His changes have been consistant, but I keep coming back to the fact that the only time he listened to me was at the point that it would affect his life. Before I told him I was done, my needs didn't matter, my requests were not important. I feel that the only reason he is making any effort is because it's easier for him, not out of any consideration for me. When he does something, he always seems to be looking for thanks in some manner.
His presence is smothering me. I feel physically anxious when he is near me. He follows me around like a puppy. I give him no positive feedback to any flirtacious comments. I have asked for space, he doesn't seem to get it. How many times should I have to ask, when I know it's hurtful for him to hear - I don't want to hurt him. Is it less painful just to end it?
Don't we deserve better than this? Is this really what I want my kids to learn about adult relationships? Sure, there is no fighting, but there is definately a lack of connection, a lack of balance in this relationship, a lack of respect I guess.
