I can't tell you what it means to me to hear that other people really do go through this!All I can boil it down to is "trust your gut feeling". My gut has never steered me wrong! So if our guts are feeling so awful in regards to reaction from these men, it's best we just stay away! As for me, when I have no contact with the man, I thrive and do best. The smallest text message can really put me off kilter sometimes. Sometimes it doesn't phase me, which is good. Shows Im getting seriously detatched from his mind games. Thanks so much for chiming in here Bea!
I feel like an odd ball divorcee' I guess you could say! I hear so many people that have been divorced or just not together anymore that have children together. I keep hearing at the 2-3 year mark is when you can start to become friends again, and end up being better friends than you ever were! I guess I was wondering if that's what was going on here. But all the while I never felt right about it. Especially after seeing him 2 days in a row at track meets.
When XH and I were going through divorce, he was living with OW, he still made me feel dirty. And that's because he all the sudden was treating me LIKE THE OW! He pursued contact and friendship with me, while he had someone else at home! Every lunch break, office time, and little 15 minute breaks, he was contacting me!
Given your therapist thinks there's a personality disorder really validates alot of things in my mind. Even my aunt said that some narcissists don't fully bloom till later in life, and that's what XH has done. Fully blossomed into the self absorbed A$$ he really is at 40!
Signs of this narcissism were always there, through our many years together. But they waxed and waned in such a way that I literally would forget about it. I mean the guy was such a sweet heart and a good husband for many years! But I still swear that when this video gaming industry blew up into all this war monging fantasy games, that's where he lost touch of reality! He literally became consumed into this! His personality changed within 2 months, and it just got worse from there on out. Everyone noticed it.
