Kimmerz, I'm sorry about the way he told his daughters about the marriage. What a putz! Right now, he's on a euphoric high because it's something to talk/brag about and he's getting some attention from everyone. That will eventually die down and he'll be right back to the same old, some old.
As for being for being friendly towards you, I'd keep my guard up on that front. Something doesn't add up w/this behavior after all of this time.
I think he's going to continue to try to be best buds w/your youngest daughter because she's not speaking up the way your older daughter is. Your older daughters caught on early as to his behaviors and, if I recall, their relationship hasn't been the best since all of this went down. She's a smart young lady and he's not going to be able to pull the wool over her eyes. LOL!
As for the XMIL, she's changed her tune very quickly w/the new DIL in the family. I wouldn't have any more conversations w/her about the way you are handling things and how your daughters are reacting to her son's behavior. As for the OW, she's not going to change and she's going to make sure your daughters do not feel welcome there because she truly does not want them involved w/their father. She wants him all to herself and guess what? It just might happen that way if he doesn't open his eyes and soon.
Your xh may have some other issues going on besides MLC. I would hate to try to diagnose his personality disorder, but he does sound like he may suffer from the NPD. But, that's my opinion.
