I occasionally come back here to read, comment and post as I carry on in my new life journey. It's still quite reassuring to see that we're all going through the motions of this and how it's completely changed our lives. Our choices is to keep moving forward and grow, or just stay stuck and sulk. I guess you could say I've done all of that along the way. It's ok to do that! Just always pick yourself up and dust yourself off!
So about 2 weeks ago, we got word the EX has now married the OW. They ran off the Vegas and apparently told everyone on the way back to town from the airport.
Breaking the news brought about a 9.5 on the Richter scale with D14. Upon picking up the girls for his weekend, he launched into telling the girls that he had been on vacation for the last week and decided to go to Vegas. He talked about things he saw, things he did, and then literally said "we really were going to have a Halloween ceremony at the end of the year, but we decided to have an Elvis Drive through ceremony instead". Then proceeded to talk even more about how wonderful his vacation was. According to D14 he was unusually happy, almost "high", tweaker style!
D14 then confronted him on his elopement. XH didn't remember what eloping was. D14 reminded him. XH looked at D14 and said " this doesn't change anything! Everything stays the same, and this well help finances". D14 wanted to go home and called me after she ran off into the woods after the news.
I then called XH. I congratulated him, and then nicely asked him to bring her back. I then told him that he must give the girls heads up on these sort of things. I also told him point blank that OW is still continuing to freeze out the girls and still makes no effort to make a relationship, and if she wants the girls to like her, SHE MUST MAKE AN EFFORT. His response was nothing but grunts and "uh huh".
Wow. What a way to talk about your new wife? Better for finances. LOL.
Since then D14 refuses to see him, and now XMIL is trying to butt in and patch things up. Even told us that her son wasn't going to be like her old boyfriends and not marry his live in girlfriend because he was better than her old boyfriends! She told me to not be angry the rest of my life and she was was worried because her son was so hurt over D14's reaction! Yet she refused to go to Christmas at her son's because of her disgust with OW. And now she's trying to tell D14 that this OW's family is really great after all!
I did slam XMIL with the truth:
#1. I don't want her son back. #2. When my babies are hurt, Im infuriated, and how he handled it was not cool. This OW has done nothing but freeze the girls out and makes no effort for 3 years now. Her son married this and the girls have every reason to not like her. #3 I've moved on with someone else.
#4 Nothing would make me happier to never see her son again.
Well that cleared alot of crap up and hopefully she'll back off.
I of course alerted XH as to what she did and had some things to say about what was going on with D14. Of course it's my fault that he can't talk to his daughter because I allowed her to come home and not go to his house because she's done!
XH has been unusually friendly, and nice to me the past several months in regards to the kids. He acted like he wanted to be my friend. He always responded to my texts pronto, even a phone call from me he answered. WE acted like parents at two track meets, and that man talked more than he has in years. Due to his acting open and kind, I made an effort to be in touch with him more. A far cry from not even speaking to me and speaking through the kids.
However the personal face to face interaction at the track meets just sucked the life out of me, and I don't know why. I was nauseous afterwards and just felt dirty and wrong for a week afterwards! What the hell was that about?
Since then XH has been way too compliant and responsive to the very few texts I've had to send in regards to D11. D11 still wishes to see him. D11 states XH was on the brink of tears after D11 responded the way she did. XH made no effort to talk to her, comfort her on the ride home and sent a text over a week later saying he loved her.
Is this MLC? Is this severe emotional intimacy handicap? Is he emotionally handicapped due to MLC? I mean it just boggles me still to this day the insensitivity that comes from this man!How long does replay last a again?
anyway guys, I just had to vent in a place where I know everyone knows exactly what the hell Im going through.
