Ok, little lightbulb moment here. Clearly I am focusing WAY too much on H. I need to step back and refocus on ME and stop worrying about and analyzing his every move. And whatever happens with him (or not), happens..
So here's my plan to get myself back to where I belong: *make sure to get a good nights sleep (with a sleep aid if needed) *get up very early tomorrow and go running *dress nicely so I can feel good about how I look *tidy up the house, it's a disaster! *get through the mountain of laundry *food shop, cook something good and healthy for dinner *work on anger management course *do something fun with the kids, play a game *read meditation book *avoid alcohol, it's fun for a bit but ultimately makes me feel crappy! *watch an old episode of Big Love *go through work email *make arrangements to volunteer at RMH again *book moonlight canoe trip
So important that I make myself plough through these things tomorrow. Otherwise I will ruminate and get myself all wound up and overly focused on H again. Tomorrow it's all about me, me, ME!
M: 42 H: 43 M: 8 years S7 and D4 H has D19 and S25 from previous M Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA 1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail 2nd separation: 5/1/14
