Not knowing what is going on in the A is for the best. If you truly DB keep that statistic in your head that these A's don't last, so concentrate on the important things for you and the kids in the long run. What is going on in the A is none of your doings and is best left that way so S doesn't project that you were intruding and trying to spy, etc. Believe me, keeping this part of the M, quiet is for the best. When you're supposed to know it'll happen and you'll deal with the information at the time. Don't push getting in the know. It only drives you crazy. We've all been there.
