While reflecting, I have realized that one of our issues was conflict avoidance, and we rarely made decisions that had conflict, and my wife would often give in, and resent me, and she would feel like she had no voice. Very valid to feel like that given the dynamics.
Obviously that is an unhealthy way to attack problems. And killer for a M. My W needs to have a voice.
I want to do a 180 on this now, and I am trying to figure out how to approach this, as our interaction is somewhat limited. I think resolving and negotiating any conflicts that do arise in a quick and fair manner for both of us would be ideal. I want to be strong and decisive, but not controlling. Giving her a voice I think comes down to attentive listening on my part, and not interrupting or arguing her points
I have really realized that I cannot argue with her, that you cannot argue a feeling, and my work has to be all action based. Any suggestions with respect to conflict resolution 180s would be appreciated.