Forgiven lazy husband - reconcilliation possible?

[rayzzz]

Not too much to report but on my CBT changing on the inside I am doing the "face it, trace it, replace it" on stupid negative thoughts:

I was lazy but I am lazy no longer
I was irresponsible...but I am now very responsible
I had no ambition...now I am very ambitious
I was loud and insecure...now I am quiet and confident

well thats a start.

As well I am just starting to pack my stuff as I am down to ten days before we vacate this place. Kids are already excited to move in with WAW and Grama & Grampas. ugh.

She asked me how I was doing and said she bawled at IC for an hour yesterday. In in my best DB voice answered "oh pretty good" with a confident & happy tone. In reality I break inside as I box away memories of my family together, photos...blah blah..i know detach...thinking of Larry David from Curb your enthusiasm...that is pretty far from reality ;D

As well my PMA to help keep myself together is now:
" I don't have time for this, I have work to do"...i.e. working on myself instead of letting anxiety rule me...and showing her that confidence. And for GAL I did Qigong again. It rules and just leaves me feeling so good. Tomorrow I am hitting the gym and then hanging out with some new friends downtown like some young college student (havent been in the city much till D day happened) maybe kareoke to sing some songs of angst!