"Like I said though, lets not pretend that people are not here to get their spouse back. My concern is that I never see her, so any changes that she wanted, will never be noticed."
No one has pretended anything to argue against that. But the FACT right now is that you can't force her to see the changes you've made within yourself. Right now, the only thing in your power to do is change for the better and once you're on stronger ground, you can try to initiate contact by giving her a casual "how are you doing?" type of message.
This is true but I can somewhat influence whether she wants to see me or not. You will see what I mean reading the bottom part of my post.
In fact, she doesn't contact you anyway so even if you did find someone else, she probably wouldn't care. Keep the thoughts on making yourself happy first.
By me not answering her call yesterday morning, she then called 2 more times last night. I figured this kind of thing would get to her and make her miss me a bit. I didnt answer either of the 2 calls last night. I told her last week that I was not interested in speaking until she was ready to work on the M. She agreed to that and even said it might be better that way. So she called me 2 days ago to yell at me about talking to her family. This is something she could have done in a text message and just told me to stop talking to them. Then for some reason she told me that she would call me back later that night. She did not but texted me that she was sorry but very tired. So yesterday she called me before work and I did not answer. And then of course last night she called 2 more times with no answer. I cant imagine why she is calling right now, surely it cannot be to yell at me still over something so small and 2 days old. The way I see it, if she wants to work on the M or talk about that, then she can come see me if it is important enough for her. I am not having an F' off attitude but I dont want to be dragged into another argument on the phone with her. We do well in person.
The other part on this one, I can promise you with everything I have that she would lose it if I started dating anyone else right now or even talked to them. I am not interested in even entertaining the idea of me with someone else right now either though. And yes I will keep working on myself for now and pretend that she isnt there unless she comes and talks to me. Give me your thoughts on this. I am assuming you will not like what Im doing right now, but you did also say to finish the books before speaking with her again and Im not quite done.
Last edited by Ben2010; 06/18/1407:06 PM.
M:33 W:30 T:10 M:2 B/D: 5/27/14 S: 5/28/14 Wife moved back in 7/18/14
