sounds like good advice.. I told her this last Wednesday that I wasn't going to stop her but I wasn't going to help with D either. i didn't want to be a part of breaking up family I was going to live each day under the same roof as a family until there was no more. She left kind of startled and went for a drive. things were looking up until I slipped up over the weekend checking up on her. She has been giving me sex reluctantly 1 or 2x a week any advice on that one. She doesn't seemed to be into it. I feel weak when she is laying there half naked! its hard to resist.
M 54 W 48 T 19 M 17 D 12 Twin S 6 Twin S 6 Ilybnilwy 1/26/14 A discovered 2/3/14 D filed 7/25/14 Sumons served 8/14/14
its not! I am sure its not helping matters! I need to be strong about not moving out and tough it out! She thinks it will be easier transition for kids! i have a feeling that the OM maybe in the background coaching her on this idea of getting me out as soon as possible. I think there maybe some issues developing there as well! But she says its been over! I just don't believe her in my heart! I am going to keep trying detachment in a loving way and see where the chips may fall. i think she is trying to make it as easy as possible on herself! The lying and manipulation are starting to where her out! I am keeping faith ,taking kids to church working bible kids camp in a few weeks. wife is talking about looking at other churches <go figure, we go to a small 70 members church, very close and people can probably see what is happening> i know its killing my wife on the inside. she is just running from all her problems. i need to keep myself from coming aprt and stay strong for kids. Wife has been yelling at 12 yr old D about anything and everything! i put the twins to bed 4-5 times a week and say a prayer with them for last 6 months. wife listens if she is in there with me but doesn't participate. And this is from a woman that says she is praying for me.
M 54 W 48 T 19 M 17 D 12 Twin S 6 Twin S 6 Ilybnilwy 1/26/14 A discovered 2/3/14 D filed 7/25/14 Sumons served 8/14/14
Its 6/19/14 and last few days have been ok. after reading post from Mr Bond and Drew about the selfish sex.That day I came home from work wife was pleasant, I asked her if I could talk to her a second. I told her I was being selfish about sex and told her it wont happen again. And left it at that! She has been more friendly last few days. yesterday came home from work in time to drop daughter off early for game. took one of the twins with me and we decided to grab a bite to eat before game started. Let wife know by text where we were and that we would get there for start of game. Well game was rained out and wife came to pizza joint with other kids and we had a good time. I didn't start any conversations but was pleasant when she brought something up. Anyway I put the boys to bed and we always say a prayer. boys didn't want to say there prayers, wife was at door and said they didn't need to pray. I firmly said don't tell me what to do! She left room! Anyway she called me from her room an hour later by phone! <it [censored], having wife call by cell phone in same house! But that's the way it go'!> Anyway she was nice and asked me what I was doing! I told her reading a book! She asked what I was reading so I told her The book parenting from the inside out! She asked me if I was learning anything and if there was anything in there for her! I told her it was a good book and if she liked she could read when I was finished! I think she was waiting for me to say yes this thing that thing etc... I was very nice but ended the conversation and said good night. She works part time for me and asked if she could come in today and work if I could take the kids for lunch. I have been thinking about stopping her working at office, but though that is one thing she does help me with and helping me may make her feel good. Anyway a few days ago I told her I would think about moving out but told her I needed sometime to think about it. I have been detaching this week and working late at work. <leaving her with kids to get a taste of a single mother< as well as seeing me move forward> I am thinking she is going to bring up the apartment in next few days. I am going to tell her I am sorry I cant do this for you! I am going to stay in our home and do the best I can with sitch but I am not going to leave to help transition the kids <her words not mine>. I think she will be angry! And if she wants to talk about D I am going to continue with my position from day 1> I cant stop you but I am not going to help in anyway! This is your deal! And leave it at that. Any suggestions
M 54 W 48 T 19 M 17 D 12 Twin S 6 Twin S 6 Ilybnilwy 1/26/14 A discovered 2/3/14 D filed 7/25/14 Sumons served 8/14/14
Reading through your post I recommend speaking to a Divorce Busting Coach. Right now, you are the one who is committed to working on your marriage. A Divorce Busting Coach will help you come up with a plan to get your marriage back on track. This will be for you, do not even discuss it with your wife since she is not interested in pro-marriage advice right now. However, the outcome of professional, divorce busting help will certainly change the relationship and the people in it. Call me to discuss our coaching program. 303-444-7004.
Roberta, Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004 Roberta@divorcebusting.com
I have been praying to god to forgive her sins and asked God to come back into her life. Well last night her and our daughter went to a sat. Night service at another church.maybe something good is happening for her.
M 54 W 48 T 19 M 17 D 12 Twin S 6 Twin S 6 Ilybnilwy 1/26/14 A discovered 2/3/14 D filed 7/25/14 Sumons served 8/14/14
In most cases, there are 2 people involved in the break-up. What's your part? That's where your focus should be. Let her deal with her salvation, you deal with yours.
You only control you.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
