Going to a coffee shop would be a positive step. Get out and discover your neighbourhood and see what's around. Read the local paper and bulletin boards to see if any activities jump out, such as MrBond's meditation example.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014
The meditation will help you to quiet your mind and stop obsessing over her. I think that's what you need the most. And not just lip service either. You either DO something about it and make a change or don't and watch your relationship wither and die. Your choice.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
1Wish, everyone is different and meditation may be for some and not for others. Personally, it's not my cup of tea. If it's in your area, would it hurt to try it? My point was that new experiences will get your blood moving, your brain ticking over and those happy hormones running. You may meet new people, you'll most certainly have more interesting things to talk about and most importantly, it distracts you from your wife. Meditation, sport, joining a crochet club... it doesn't matter what you do, go out and find something for yourself, that gives you ideas and makes you happy.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014
When my wife came home today she been off with me and I asked her what was wrong and she said its me being here.. she said she hates coming home to find me here.. she got angry and broke her phone.. soo weird.. I really dont know why.. she started saying stuff about my parents and then she said she wants me out tonight.. I said ill go tomorrow.. she was angry and said no today.. but I said tomorrow
Really? Come on. You know what we're all going to say. Pull your head in.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014
No. You look weak if you allow W to push you around and 'demand' that you move out. I've seen situations where the WAS pushes the LBS out and install the OM/OW in their place.
We all tell the newbies here not to move out of their house. If the WAS is so unhappy, they should be the one to move out. Calmly tell W that she needs to be the one to move out if she's unhappy.
We all tell the newbies here not to move out of their house.
It's just about the only topic around here that gets near-100% unanimous opinion. Exposure, tough boundaries, sex-while-they're-wayward, do-I-wear-my-wedding-rings . . . those all have reasonable opinions on all sides, but [b]the BETRAYED SPOUSE SHOULD NEVER MOVE OUT OF THEIR MARITAL BED, OR THEIR MARITAL HOME. Period.[/b]
