Oh he didn't 'decide' to leave his wife and family - we should never have married. For reasons he doesn't understand he just stayed around and participated in family life (without ever enjoying it)

Welcome, belatedly Bea!
This was also said by my husband. Exactly. "We should never have married. He was never happy." Same script.

Yet, HE relentlessly pursued me. He practically begged me to pick a wedding date when I was putting it off. Up until 3 years ago he was telling people he was my "last" husband, when I'd introduced him as my 2nd husband.

I dont think they're acting. I think they BELIEVE it! They are drinking the koolaide! I asked that question of an MLCer (former) on this forum and he told me that he believed these statements when he said them to his X wife, but only later he came to look back and deeply regretted it and realized it was not true. He also said he had remorse that he could not get rid of now.

M 56 H 52
M 13.5 T 15
S 28 twinStep Ds 24
ILYBNILWY BD 1/5/14 OW 4/11/14
Divorce petition efiled 5/5/14
Divorce final 7/8/14