"I don't see anything wrong with saying OM should not pay."
Why do you keep insisting this? What your W decides to do and who pays for what she does isn't up to you. You're trying to control things by "hoping" that she'll suffer by having to pay things on her own. That's up to her to decide. Not you.
"Also folks on some of the other marriage boards seem to always advocate throwing her out, saying she does not love me etc.
Can I ask you what your opinion is of that?"
My opinion is to stick to one board. Every board is going to be different. If you want to continue to be called a doormat and weak on those other boards then I wish you well. If you want to save your M, then stick to this one.
The bottom line is that YOU are the one who is going to have to make the decisions. Don't let others influence you. Make up your own mind. Only you know what you will or will not tolerate. You're still looking for the magic plan. There is none. Just do what works.
When she left, what did you and her agree upon? If you can't stand living with her, then tell her how you feel and that it's best if she leaves. Simple as that.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
