I think I'm just overall frustrated with things. I'm frustrated with how people are treating me. I'm frustrated that I'm currently allowing it, and I'm frustrated that I have to teach them a different way.
My compassion and grace tank is on empty. And the anger is settling in. I know I could be handling things better.. I just have to do it
Because although anger is a good feeling to have, I'm also expressing it in my behavior. And I need that to stop that.
I can see that there is fear behind all of those actions. From the way new girl expressed it to the way my family lashes out. But my initial response is to take space from them and create distance so I can treat them the way they deserve to be treated. I put them on a tier where I don't invest as much or be as vulnerable with them.
But that seems to upset both my family and her. So I stayed and I didn't end of up handling it very well.
Now I guess it's time to sit with the uncomfortable. Sit with my feelings so I can eventually work out how to let them go.
In a way that's best for me. Because it's only when I can be my best - that I can give them my best.
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
