These week-apart updates are starting to become regular now. Not much is changing really. My wife and I are doing our own things under the same roof and I'm enjoying it. Sure, I look forward to the days when there may be a relationship as well. I'm in a good place at the moment though. I've been off work most of last week due to the flu and my wife has been excellent helping me with ideas to try and beat it. She even asked if I'd be fine with the kids one night which was nice.
Through the week we attended mediation for D4. I wasn't permitted to be a part of it so I ran some errands and caught up with my wife and solicitor in the breaks. Nothing substantial was achieved and yet my wife was reasonably happy with how things went as our solicitor was very supportive of her.
This week my MIL has traveled the country to stay with us. It's been an interesting couple of days so far and definitely testing my patience. She's a nice person but she's nosey, a bit of a know it all, a hypochondriac and self-centred. She also has a habit of telling you all sorts of things noone is interested in. My wife joked tonight that she was going to kill her before the week is out so I'm not the only one who is feeling irritated. As much as we appreciate my MIL coming to visit, it's business as usual for my wife and I with work, kids and house.
The cross-country trip next February has been a bit of a hot topic. My wife and MIL have been discussing it and my wife has been throwing ideas my way. I've received and responded to her ideas as appropriate yet I still feel uncomfortable with the idea of booking a trip while not knowing if we'll be a family then or not. As much as my wife has made no movement towards me, things between us have been positive and friendly, and it feels like we're a family, just without the relationship. My wife even appears to be treating the holiday as a family holiday, despite the uncertainty about our relationship. My wife discovered a sale on airfares today that would save us $1000 on flights plus several hundred dollars in fuel, accommodation and lost wages. Needless to say, we're going to have to make some quick decisions to save a substantial amount of money.
That escalated things a little. For me, I feel that I'll have to address the uncertainty sooner as I want to be up front with my wife about our presence at the wedding. As I mentioned last week, I don't want to pretend to be a happy family if we're not a family. At the same time, I REALLY don't want to push my wife as things are quite good between us at the moment and I'd like to let things grow rather than force an outcome. I overheard my MIL asking questions about our sleeping arrangements in February and my wife said "it's only June. I don't know." I'm looking for accommodation near the wedding where we have the option of sleeping together or in separate rooms. While visiting my wife's family however, my wife intends on having us stay at MIL's house which could pose some logistical challenges with potentially separated parents and three children between two rooms.
All in all, as I said earlier, it feels like we're getting on with family life, and my wife and I are getting along well, just without the relationship.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014