Hi P. Welcome to one of the crappiest clubs on the planet - the MLCr club.
There are some items 'stickied' at the top of the forum. Have you read those yet? Cadet has a tendency to pop by and post a consolidated list, but in the meantime those should be good reading.
Your conversation reminds me of a good friend of mine. He went through similar, although for a short-ish period of time. Several years. He was depressed, had difficulty sleeping, tried all kinds of new things, flirted with pretty young things, etc. He eventually came out of it and he and his wife are doing great. It could have gone either way, and had absolutely nothing to do with his wife. Nothing. Her only contribution during the entire time was listening to him and not kicking him out.
What I'm getting at is that no matter what a MLCr says and does and accuses, it's not about you. It's about them and them trying to survive day to day. Even if you can't see it, there's usually a tremendous amount of turmoil and difficulty.
You can't stop it, change it, or otherwise make it better. You can get out of the way and let it burn itself out. He has to figure it out and he has to do so alone.
HTH,
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
