Bright, There is a 50/50 chance that someone in MLC will make it thru. No one knows who will and who won't. Some make it thru and return to the person they once were, i.e, more mature and a bit wiser from the trip. Others return from the trip have some of the "quirks/habits" that they took up during that trip remain w/them the rest of their lives. Then there are the few lost souls that remain mlc bound, i.e., angry, resentful and continue to act like middle/old age teenagers.
Again, there is a 50/50 change that they will return and yes, there is always hope...but the question is...how long do you wait, i.e., 5, 10, 15 or longer years? While you are hanging around, live your life to the fullest because there is no guarantee that if your spouse makes it thru that you'll want to reconcile. It's important that you keep hope alive, leave the door ajar, but live your life as if he/she may never return. You can't put your life on hold w/thoughts of "what if" each and every day.
My xh is one of those that is lost and he's been a changed man for a very long time. His changes began in the mid 1990's and he's not the same person that I knew and still exhibts a lot of teenage behavior in the way he thinks, what he purchases, bills, etc.
Like Mach said, read the postings and take away what you can use to help you w/your journey.
