I know this is a marriage saving site and I promise to update this thread later with all the db mistakes I made during labor.
I am asking for prayers please for Lillian. She arrived at 2:32 this afternoon and was transferred to another hospital and placed in the NICU. I am grateful they released Mr so I could go be with her.
Me: 35 husband:39 Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage Twins 5 (boy/girl) Daughter 3 Affair bomb 2/27/14 He moved in with ow 3/13/14 OW kicked him out 6/15/14 4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction
M: 42 H: 43 M: 8 years S7 and D4 H has D19 and S25 from previous M Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA 1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail 2nd separation: 5/1/14
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
HUGE guilt, can't stop sobbing/being slightly hysterical right now. Lilly is going through withdraw symptoms from the zoloft and ativan I took because I couldn't handle the situation between me and H.
I stopped taking it about a month ago so this wouldn't happen but it still did. They are treating her for the withdrawals and she will be here minimum 5 days.
We are not at the hospital where I delivered so I was "discharged" after 2 hours and no room to sleep in here just a waiting room.
They won't let me nurse her because they want to measure everything so I have to pump and give a bottle when all I really want to do is hold her close to me. We aren't allowed to hold her at all. H has not held her at all yet, I was allowed to immediately after birth but only for a few minutes till they took her away.
I hurt my baby because I couldn't handle stress, worst f'ing mom ever. I can't even look at her knowing I did this to her.
Me: 35 husband:39 Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage Twins 5 (boy/girl) Daughter 3 Affair bomb 2/27/14 He moved in with ow 3/13/14 OW kicked him out 6/15/14 4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction
