Continuing my DB'ing journey...

[Georgiabelle]

TO,

Reading your posts make me sad. Your h's behavior is a reflection of him-not you. It isn't a competition because an 18 yr old can't compete with you.

Now I admit I am extremely logical and that is not always a good thing in situations like this. Let's look at it from this perspective. Your 30 yr old husband is sleeping at his boss's house and having an affair with an 18 yr old. He left a wife who is working 2 jobs to support their 2 young boys while being the full time parent. Regardless of what happens, he can never get this time back with his boys and he has done a great deal of damage. Will the 18 yr old be dealing with that damage? No. Will the boss and his wife be dealing with that damage? Nope.

Hijack alert next..... I'm a 42 yr old mother of 3 kids with a full time job and full time parenting responsibilities. My h decided his life changed when we had kids and mine didn't (that's a direct quote). He has abandoned his family, his parents, says his former friends look * old*, and has a just turned 28 yr old girlfriend in vet school. They hang out with his *best friends* who are a 26 yr old guy and his 25 yr old fiancé. My h thinks he looks cool right now and is living life " full tilt boogey." Really? My kids would disagree. And I have ZERO desire to compete with this lifestyle. He said he quit his old life of responsibilities and obligations and has a new "college" lifestyle. I have said zilch about any of this. Why? Because it's on him. I can work on me and you can work on you. However, I love my kids and have no desire to try to recapture something that can't be or redo something that cannot be redone. I'm willing to bet the 18 yr old is desperate for attention and I know for a fact the 28 yr old is.

You cannot control what your h does. I understand that his behavior is hurtful. Listen to wounded fool. Your h thinks he's finally living, and he is really missing out. Will he come to realize what he's done? No one knows. You cannot control that either. Live the best life you can and be the best you can be. You are setting an example for your boys because they are watching.

Hang in there:)