Walk. I don't see any of either the remorse or the self-awareness for you two to even be CLOSE to a mutually-healthy, equally-balanced relationship right now.
Down the road? Another matter. Maybe apart, she'll start to "own her s&*t" and begin to do the work necessary. There's obviously SOME connection there between the two of you, so who knows what the future might hold.
My two cents -- it's obviously your (very important) call, pkp. If you stay, I honestly see you being RIGHT BACK here 3-6 months from now, I really do.
Starsky
I really still don't see your wife having that "What will it take?"/introspective/remorseful attitude that I think is necessary for a successful reconciliation after adultery.
While I don't think the actual WORDS "I'm sorry" are always necessary (I posted in more detail on this to you recently), there is an overall "smell test" that I'm pretty good at spotting, and I don't think your wife is there yet. I think when she nears the brink and stares into the abyss, she gets scared and tells you what you want to hear, but at this stage she should be willing to answer ANY AND ALL questions that you have about her affair.
And for YOUR part, you need to be willing to listen with a non-judgmental, forgiving, "don't-lord-it-over-her-for-the-rest-of-her-life" attitude.
Unless BOTH of those are present, I've never seen a couple pull this off yet in all my years on here. Maybe once or twice, tops, if that??
