This is my very first post though I have being going through this for about 2 years now - my mlc husband lives and works abroad since he lost his job. This is such a long story and like so many others posted here. Married 25 years this year. Doesn't know what he wants, doesn't know what love is and doesn't think anyone does really. Thinks I am great with how I am 'handling' this now (did the crying, pleading for a few months and then started 'letting go'. I found out that he was having an affair, started it just when he moved over for work, he would never have told me, thinks that because he is abroad no one has to know. I confronted him about the affair (had proof) and he ended it a few months later but he is now seeing lots of woman, some of them as young as our eldest daughter (25), he tells them he is not interested in a relationship. My question is, I know alot about what he is doing, and with whom but I have not told him directly yet - i am a very good 'snoop', a recent discovery of my talent though - i would never have checked up on him before all of this. do I tell him what I know? only our eldest son (31) knows about what his father is doing, our 3 daughters have no clue, in fact no one else knows - i am keeping his secret because I feel that if I tell everyone he would find it impossible to eventually come home. he was depressed and sucicidal when he left, but things are going well for him for him now, finally - he left the OW as soon as he was in a position to fend for himself, get his own apartment, pay bills etc. she is still waiting around for him to come back to her though. He says he is lonely but when he comes home to visit I know he is online dating and communciating with other woman. he is a charmer and is using this to his advantage while he has a bachelor pad. sorry, am rambling now - these are just the bare bones of my story for now.
