Thank you cadet. I have a very long journey ahead. I gave had a dark and horrible few days. I won't elaborate because it is something that only a few close friends will understand. I have read my w words again words she has written over 19 months. I know I was told to believe only half of what I read but I do know parts of my W and her words are her heart. She has moved on. She is happy and it is clear she has little respect or trust or faith in me. It hurts but it is something I must own. I don't know why I came to this forum. It is to save a marriage. I think I knew mine was over. But the truths and support I received over the last few very dark days have meant a lot. I will continue my work with my C. I will read the suggested readings because I think they will help me in the future but I won't continue to post. This place is for people with hope at saving a marriage and it is a good one. You've all gone through some much and to that end I know I'm not alone. I honestly thought I had given everything of myself to W. But I failed and gave her not much at all. I think. I'm going to take time to grow with myself and find my own happiness.
