Looking back I think it would have been healthier for both of us to have some big huge explosion. That way we both could have said " oh look a problem. Let's fix that". My W had written that she knew about my EA. And how it hurt her and why didn't I get that part from her. For my part I didn't know I was having an EA ( I hope someone in here understands that ). For me it was a co worker who was going through hard times , D and children troubles. She valued my input and we talked often. If felt so good to have someone ask my opinion. w never asked my opinion. Right from the beginning. That's not a shot. It's a truth. So in the very typical male mind I was flattered to have a woman seek me out and ask for help. And stupidly I never associated it with an A. " because we weren't physical". But reflection has me asking myself a question and already knowing the answer. " if I thought it was fine why did I keep it from W?" Arrrg cause somewhere in my gut I knew it wasn't fine! I'm starting to really hate this self examination ;-)
Actually I see this as good first steps in where you need to go.
So if you now know that it wasnt fine - what can you DO about that?
