What I am having a hard time with, is my emotions, are taking over and I act too quick and regret the things I say and do. Just this morning she left the house and didnt even tell me. I panicked, called her, and started to question where she was or going. I know I shouldn't of done that, but just couldn't stop it. I just didn't want to get played again. I'm having a hard time forgiving and trusting when she's away. It's killing me. We used to always do things together and go places together. Now, I'm left out. I do feel like a fool to keep trying to hold everything we have together, while she is not. Detach, Cadet says, don't know how. Tried to, but keep going back to the emotional state of mind that makes me want to reason and try to get back what we had. Not to the same marriage, but to a new marriage with happiness. As for the mentioning of D, she hasn't brought it up but does so when I get angry about the A, and how she's not even helping me deal with it. Should she? I thought she should because of the A, it really messed my mind and heart up. I'm severely hurt and scrambling to find a cure. Uuugh this [censored]! All the emotions comes at me throughout the day...be betrayed by both a friend and my W, lied to, feeling used, no help or remorse from W. Guys and gals, I'm so lost and can't find a direction to go.
