Thanks everyone. Very quickly, 25, my W does not go to IC. She did years ago but only for a short time and said it was a "waste" because she didn't tell her what she wanted to hear. I would feel so much better if she just would get some C of ANY kind! I'll respond to the other stuff later but very scary.
Wonka, she told me she wanted to be the one to tell our youngest. That should be the way. Both of us present and both of us able to answer her questions. If I was the one going I would want it that way as well. If I tell my D alone and she gets upset my W will probably tell me I was manipulating her to feel that way. I don't want any more of that than needed. If she's there, she can't tell me I said anything untoward that would try and put her in a bad light. She just keeps putting it off.
