I have a hunch that you know the answer to the above questions. I can tell you that I did the same as you CW. I did not communicate my needs well instead i kept quiet became resentful and later got angry. They are very passive/aggressive behaviors. Those behaviors will destroy a marriage.

If you wanted the house clean they way you thought it should have been clean...How come you didnt clean it yourself? May be in the eyes of your W the house was clean? There are always different perceptions to things.
Keep posting u doing good


M 53
D 20
Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24
Together 26 yrs
Married 16
W Filed for D 7/21/11
Served 9/6/11
D final 8/28/12

“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”

John Wooden