I can't help but mention (and I apologize as I'm feeling rather feisty today), but I'm struck the number of spouses that say perhaps we can reconcile 2 years, 5 years, or 10 years from now. I understand about 15-20% of divorced couples remarry. However, it's just so completely irrational (which shows the thought process) to assume that the LBS couldn't and wouldn't move on a live their lives. Interesting.
It sounds so crazy. If you think you'll likely get back together someday, why waste all this effort and emotion and time on a D? The sad thing is that I was actually pinning some of my hopes on that. Honestly, that was a fear-based and not a love-based response. I wouldn't want my D to sit around and wait for something that MIGHT happen in 2 or 5 or 10 years if her H was doing what mine is. I've now realized that I can't set that example for her.
My sister was at my house tonight. She drafted my answer to H's petition for divorce. I either have to go to the courthouse next week, or figure out how to use the state's e-filing system. A week ago, I probably would have been sobbing uncontrollably at having to draft that. Tonight, it just felt like a business transaction. After that, she and I worked on these crafty projects she wants done for my nephew's birthday party decorations. I was talking and laughing and NOT thinking about how I had just gotten a step closer to my M being dissolved.
