hope456 - he filed, what now?

[Georgiabelle]

Hope,

I'm going to be blunt. Getting a divorce isn't going to make your h a better father. My own h said that (and I've read countless others here say their h said that) and it's completely ridiculous. If that were so, then any time someone went for counseling or to a parenting class, the initial announcement would be, " in order to be a good parent, you need to file for divorce or stay single" It's horse caca. Sorry.

Listen to the others. I know you love your h and no one wants their kids to grow up in a home without both parents , except for those WAS and MLCers wanting to be better parents. You wonder if you will ever trust and love someone again. I think many of us can relate to that too. However, sometimes we finally realize the person we are with are rather self centered and they only have the capacity to do x. And that they lack the desire and ability to look within themselves at some of their issues (door stopper for many). And that can be quite the reality check.

I often feel bad for the LBS who has many hopes on their WAS or MLCer going to IC. Although IC can be extremely beneficial, you can spend thousands of $$$$ and if you a) aren't truly honest b) aren't willing to do the work, then you will get a better return throwing $ up in the air.

Good luck with whenever you decide to talk to your D. She is lucky to have you.