Hi Wonka, You are right and I wouldn't have retold the story if I didn't have someone telling me that I was not being compassionate and going on about things I said to my D I didn't. I just really didn't like that. Sorry about that. It was uncalled for but I get a bit too upset at the moment when I feel attacked and that my words are being twisted. Even when the other persons intentions were good.
I'm starting to see that I have to just ignore certain things and let stuff go. I'll tell you that for the first time in a long time I felt that this board was a negative for me as I started to feel attacked and right now, with all that's going on and my adrenaline as high as it is I tend to "fight" when I feel attacked! Not normal for me as I'm usually the peace maker!
I have ever been like that before now and I guess it's because I suddenly am thinking I should have been more aware and done things differently. I really was very easy going and didn't get upset easily. Maybe I should have been more forceful with my W and just in general. I feel sometimes like the world is out to get me and I need to be ready to defend myself and family any second.
I got the lawyer paid for but still have homework to do with him. Had the talk I was dreading with my mom and dad. Worked on finding another job. All that is left on my list is my own account which shouldn't be a problem except I need to keep the joint open has tax money is going to that account. It is taking forever to get here!
You are right and I'm on my way to getting off the tracks. Just need to untie my D's so they don't get run over by that train! Thanks again for slapping me back into the present and putting my attention on what I need to do NOW!
