Originally Posted By: labug
Why do you need to control her?

You have enough to work on with you.



I guess I've never looked at it as controlling her... but I will concede that's what it is if that's what it is.

From my perspective I've always thought of it as she's free to do what she wants, but that I'm due at least a basic level of consideration/respect. This is my boundary. She can do what she wants when she wants, but I don't want to wake up at 1am...2am...3am, wondering where my W is and when she'll be home.

I guess if we're not piecing/reconciling than I shouldn't even expect that from her?

I guess from my perspective I was looking at it as we are getting along so well that it was ok to ask for this one thing. I don't want to control her per se, but I felt like this was ok...this was a fair thing for me to want and not unreasonable on my part. At the very least, she indicated she agreed with me when we talked about it before.

Guess that's not the case?

Last edited by stumps; 06/02/14 03:08 PM.
H: 43
W: 37
M: 11 years
T: 12 years
S: 11
D: 8
ILYBINILWY, "I want to move out" and "I want a divorce": 3/23/14
MC started: 9/22/14
Affair and past infidelity discovered: 9/26/14
Piecing: 10/20/14