Sage advice of course. I've actually bookmarked the Sandi's Rules of course and that exact link on detachment before, but I really like the idea of personalizing it with names of my W and the OM. I think it will help make it feel more real, and more applicable. Also, the support and advice on these boards is really amazing. Another thanks to everyone that has commented and offered some advice.
Last few days been interesting, but nothing major. My W had some crying after a long day with the kids on Monday. She reiterated how she feels she is a bad mom, has difficulty with parenting, and it makes her feel like she wants to kill herself. She then said when she's in the home and with the kids is the only time she feels this way. She said she thinks about it often. I personally think she is being manipulative, and don't think she would do anything.
I said it must be awful to feel like that, and left it at that. I wanted to say, "well, choosing to be on your own isn't going to help that overwhelmed feeling very much", but I resisted. It was very hard.
She had put in some time, because I'm guessing(mind-reading, I know it's bad) she was going to be away to see the OM on Tuesday. Tuesday AM she called to say she was too tired and wasn't going anywhere, and wanted to spend time with my S8 on a hike after school.
I don't really make much of it, but for a second I had a glimmer of hope, but I quickly stuffed it away. Not even close to having that happen yet. Detachment, detachment, detachment. The key to survival.
