she's off to have a great vacation with OM. basically with your blessing. of course she's going to be happy. at this point she doesnt care what happens after. she only needs to pretend until she gets to the airport. I'd guess in her mind, she doesnt even think about what will happen when she gets back, she probably just shuts down any thought of it.
and yes, my X. never ended the affair, continued to say one thing and do another. pretended to me and her family that she was working on the marriage. lied when she had to.
Basically everything your x is doing.
Of the many things i did wrong, I most regret not taking a stand. I tried the nice guy approach, the understanding husband approach, the TIMID approach. they all failed.
Starsky was there giving me the same advice and i should have taken it. But i was scared. i took the non-confrontational way out. I chose inaction.
What you need to think about is this: IF she comes back and says she's done with OM, are you strong enough to truly forgive her sleeping with him? All those gory details she gave you, can you forgive them?
because at the time i was going through it, i thought i could, i thought she was the love of my life and i would love her forever. (that was simply the psychology of wanting what i couldnt have) Looking back now, i know that i was only fooling myself. i would have despised her for it, i would have held it over her. and if i had prevented the divorce, i would only have delayed it.
my advice to you is stand up for yourself and show some self-esteem, some pride.
tell her that if she goes, then its over. and then when she goes, work to make it so. when she comes back, serve her the papers and take a stand for yourself and your children.
obviously your children know what is happening, set a good example on how a man should be.
Last edited by KenF; 05/28/1401:21 PM.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
