OK, some thoughts here: not necessarily in order, and may seem a bit random. I am someone who struggles with punctuality BUT I long ago took myself in hand. I recognise it is very important to many people (outside of the obvious work context) and is interpreted as a lack of respect. And they are right - it isn't overt lack of respect but it is a failure to realise that the time and needs of others is important, and should be important to me (I don't use should much but do here).
However there is a second point. Why is punctuality important to you - if it is respect - fine, but it can tip over into control. And for you, how long before you get anxious?
The final thing that is worth thinking about is that being late CAN also be a form of control. Many passive aggressive people are late, to control others - I don't think mine was p/a, just I failed to organise myself properly.
And this brings me to something slightly tricky to say. You are doing fabulously well - frankly better in terms of getting out there and meeting guys than I am after more than eight years, but be prepared for the fact that your judgement may be skewed. It is clear from your postings that dealing with the divorce itself is understandably throwing you. You may be less 'over' your stbx than you care to admit. The new guy may be great, but immediately after the demise of a long term relationship, we are not always firing on all four cylinders.
Follow your instincts - if it bothers you now it will bother you more, I suspect, in six months time. Address it early. If it is passive aggressive, you will soon find out. If not then you will probably be able to compromise - which may mean he gets to be late some of the time, but tries not to be, and you give him some slack. Asking him to call you though it perfectly reasonable.
