[BrightFuture]

I’m back from the vacation place. Had some fun with my friends and other friends who were there. Met some new people. Went to the sea with the dog and enjoyed myself.

There were some hard moments too. When I arrived at the condo I noticed some decorative arrangements on the table, plates with wine glasses and folded napkins in them. I thought it was weird for H. Too feminine for his taste. I was never pushing these things on him, we always decorated in kind of a neutral way. So, I went to see my friends that night and when I was taking them back to their house I asked about this. They told me that one of H’s drunken buddies did some decorations in the condo. I was furious… I blew a gasket… I told my friends that I don’t appreciate it at all and that I’m going to tell this woman to not touch anything in my condo. My GF said that she knew that it would upset me. But her H was trying to reason with me, saying that the condo is H’s now, because he pays the mortgage. I said that as long as we are officially not D’d and I’m still on the mortgage, I consider that condo to be my property.

When I came back to the condo that night, I removed all the strange decoration and while I was at it, I also the pictures of H’s family that were above the fireplace. He can put them back when he comes back at the end of the year. Meantime, I want to enjoy the place without being distracted.

I think I’m just tired of rolling over and be nice to H. My friends brought up some thoughts about H again. My male friend said that he thinks that he’s been thinking about the fact that H has not filed for D yet and didn’t cut all the ties. He said that it would be natural thing to do if someone would not want to be M’d anymore and would not want to live with his W. My friend said that he thinks that H is afraid to cut all the ties, and that he is cake eating right now. It is like my friend read this site, LOL. My GF asked me how often I hear from H and she was surprised to find out that he gets in contact with me pretty regularly, usually having some legitimate excuses about business. They both said that all H wants to do is party and have fun. He is obsessed with water volleyball. He gets upset when the male friend cannot make it to the pubs with him often enough.

I don’t know where I’m with my feelings right now. I get angry, and then I get indifferent, then I start missing the “old” H, then I get angry again…

He sent me an e-mail on the same day when I left for vacation home, thanking me for the company file (something he didn’t do last year – thanking me) and asking me to give him the info about the joint credit card that we use for business. I guess he wants to do his own expenses now. The funny thing is that the guy who is “working on getting rid of the computer” wants the online account info, so he could get the statements and pay the bills. I just sent him the info. Less work for me…