What did you decide about the tickets? I'm sure everything will work out okay.

I think it's a great idea to have two different celebrations so that you and your h both can have people at them that you both feel comfortable with. After all it is your child's special day and celebration and you do not anyone to feel uncomfortable or take away from the special celebration.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.