He has made a lot of noise about how important my friendship is to him. I told him yesterday that OW is a deal-breaker. I can't be friends with someone who is confiding in a person who is such a huge source of pain to me. That is my issue and has nothing to do with what I think of the relationship at all. But it is a deal-breaker. I think he heard me. But I don't expect to know what he decides about that, or when. And it wouldn't matter, because his word is no longer good and I don't have the means to check up on him since so much of their communication occurs on technology that I don't have access to. So we'll see what happens.
He has been thoughtful in big and small ways, so there is at least the possibility that we may be friends again someday, because nothing new is happening to excite my hostility. And I'm proud of how self-aware I've been, walking away when I feel too emotional, finding things to do while he's here, etc. This evening after the kids go to bed should be interesting.
I still feel like I'm on the right track for myself. I don't know what will happen with the marriage. But setting my own expectations for what I need is very freeing. He may come back or he may not. We may end up divorced, or not. I may have to sell the house, or not. Either way there are things to look forward to so I'm trying to be curious about the future rather than hung up on it. Right now I just want my kids to be ok.
All that said, I'm a little distracted by some teeny-tiny in-law issues. Sigh. Humans are so imperfect.
Last edited by Maybell; 05/24/1403:52 PM.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
