glad to hear from you and glad your dad is recuperating. it's hard when our parents get old. i always wonder if it's like waking up f eeling not so good- and then knowing it willll never be better than today. eek. even when i'm sick i look forward to end of the cold- gotta be dispiriting a bit. i guess some people manage it better than others.
about asking. your so sounds like mine. maybe you'll get neutral, non-commital doofis answers like i do. for a lawyer who made his "fortune" with his powers of persuasion- he is amazingly unable to communicate (or amazingly unwilling) . t ho, he never talked about his feelings or r even early in r. what a guy, what a person. i'd give alot to even begin to understand what the heck he can be thinking. he swears he just doesn't think...(???) and that he doesn't think further ahead in life than about 15 minutes.
i think it's a dopey thing to even say- yet he does. maybe too many drugs in the 60s and certain portions of brain are just fried.
idk- but i'd say what the heck. perhaps he has some perspective and will surprise you. if you feel like it- i'd say do it.
i spend most of my time biting my tongue so i do not ask anything- because it never makes me happy or feel anything other than "what a selfish schmo". and also- "what a dud and is thaty really all this guyu has to say. it's like even kindness or compassion are going to cost him too darn much - kind of thing. nothing to sink my teeth into. it's soooo lame i just end up feeling embarassed for him and embarassed to realize he doesn't even feel enough to bother to try and think up stuff to say, or explain, or something....anything. just closes up like a big ole clam. mayube when he is faced with emotions - he just becomes disabled inside.
or - more like - maybe he's sooooo fearful of displaying any affection, understanding, because he thinks i'll rip my cloths off and attack him (joke) idk
he spends his life grilling me and anyone that talks to him- yet answer any questions himself- nope....
scorpios - my motehr could not say affectonate things to her children. others, okay, - us, no way. once we were asking her about her childhood, when she got yanked out of school (13) and what she felt- and she just began crying in the car. couldn't talk about it- and yet it was such a powerful memory and bad time of her life - she absolutely couldn't find any words!!! how f'ing wierd is that??? she and he are alot alike- i wonder all the time what sort of a sicko i am to have chosen him and not seen.
either mwd is right and they're mlc and nuts. orrrr, i've wasted the bulk of my adult life on this cold detched person. i wonder where the heck the wonderful guy went- if he's in there somewhere - like my alcoholic sister. who was the real person??? was she in there still? or was it the person who appeared with alcohol. never found out- still don't know and never will.
him too-
well- good luck. you're sounding very good these days. is it really 14 years for you??? that is sooo long-
